Wednesday, January 24, 2007
Sunday, January 21, 2007
Being a family..
Okay, we had some hardcore nights! What can I say, ROOKIES! :)))
It's just that human cubs are so helpless, and that is their greatest survival skill. Naturally all parents find their baby irresitable, and we're no different...but the parenting road is full of SPOIL ME traps...
So, it was hard ..and now it's getting easier....As 3 week old parents we set ourselves some healthy guidelines:
1. Andrei needs to be a part of the family NOT the center of it. Keep mom, dad and baby happy. (This is the best thing I've learned. Baby happy and at the center of things is the sure way to 2 ragged parents and eventually an unhappy kid).
2. It's OKAY to let baby cry...Eventually is only for couple of minutes. Instant gratification is no good.
Early days he got used to being held and cuddled most of the time. Nasty habbit! And the little buggers get attached to the good life so quickly...We had to unlearn that!:)
3. Stay close to a flexible routine...Life is soooo much easier with a baby when we can predict at least part of our day...
Ohh...and we loooove BATH TIME WITH DADDY!!!
Okay, we had some hardcore nights! What can I say, ROOKIES! :)))
It's just that human cubs are so helpless, and that is their greatest survival skill. Naturally all parents find their baby irresitable, and we're no different...but the parenting road is full of SPOIL ME traps...
So, it was hard ..and now it's getting easier....As 3 week old parents we set ourselves some healthy guidelines:
1. Andrei needs to be a part of the family NOT the center of it. Keep mom, dad and baby happy. (This is the best thing I've learned. Baby happy and at the center of things is the sure way to 2 ragged parents and eventually an unhappy kid).
2. It's OKAY to let baby cry...Eventually is only for couple of minutes. Instant gratification is no good.
Early days he got used to being held and cuddled most of the time. Nasty habbit! And the little buggers get attached to the good life so quickly...We had to unlearn that!:)
3. Stay close to a flexible routine...Life is soooo much easier with a baby when we can predict at least part of our day...
Ohh...and we loooove BATH TIME WITH DADDY!!!
Monday, January 15, 2007
Thais love nicknames...
A : He's cute...What's his name?
Ake: Han-Ming.
A : It's Chinese. What's his Thai name?
Ake: Nope, just Han -Ming. And Andrei, the romanian name.
A: How about a nickname?
Ake: he he...sorry, no nick name. Just Andrei Han-Ming.
A: Ohhh...:(
On Postparthum Depression
I read loads of books on babies and pregnancy and one thing I couldn't understand was being depressed after delivery. Why would you? I was so ready to pop, so anxious to see the little guy..9 months was a long wait.
Doctors explain postparthum depression as a sudden hormone level drop. Anyhow, I never thought I'd even come close to feeling depressed...dog tired, YES...missing my care free life before baby, YES...but not depressed.
Here's how it hit me. First there's the awe of birth which lasts for few days. Then I ACTUALLY started missing having a tummy (weird, but I did) and feeling the kicks and the movements..that was on the outside, but really, my son and I were no longer ONE.
They say newborns do not realize they are a separate being from their mother, until the later months, and when they do, the letting go happens in tears...same thing goes for moms!!!...and most of them as we all know, NEVER LET GO. Three words: MOTHER IN LAW.
I know now how my dad felt when I got married.
A : He's cute...What's his name?
Ake: Han-Ming.
A : It's Chinese. What's his Thai name?
Ake: Nope, just Han -Ming. And Andrei, the romanian name.
A: How about a nickname?
Ake: he he...sorry, no nick name. Just Andrei Han-Ming.
A: Ohhh...:(
On Postparthum Depression
I read loads of books on babies and pregnancy and one thing I couldn't understand was being depressed after delivery. Why would you? I was so ready to pop, so anxious to see the little guy..9 months was a long wait.
Doctors explain postparthum depression as a sudden hormone level drop. Anyhow, I never thought I'd even come close to feeling depressed...dog tired, YES...missing my care free life before baby, YES...but not depressed.
Here's how it hit me. First there's the awe of birth which lasts for few days. Then I ACTUALLY started missing having a tummy (weird, but I did) and feeling the kicks and the movements..that was on the outside, but really, my son and I were no longer ONE.
They say newborns do not realize they are a separate being from their mother, until the later months, and when they do, the letting go happens in tears...same thing goes for moms!!!...and most of them as we all know, NEVER LET GO. Three words: MOTHER IN LAW.
I know now how my dad felt when I got married.
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
Just a quick note on a very very busy diaper day and couple more snap shots of Andrei.
I'm doing this spa for moms...a Thai traditional thing which is absolutely fantastic. This lady comes everyday to our place and for about 5 hours (without bfeeding and diaper change breakes) it's full on massage/ sauna / oil rubb / aromateraphy / herbal presses and some special tummy massage to readjust the uterus...my tummy is nearly gone!!!:)
I'm doing this spa for moms...a Thai traditional thing which is absolutely fantastic. This lady comes everyday to our place and for about 5 hours (without bfeeding and diaper change breakes) it's full on massage/ sauna / oil rubb / aromateraphy / herbal presses and some special tummy massage to readjust the uterus...my tummy is nearly gone!!!:)
Saturday, January 06, 2007
Birth of Andrei Han-Ming
Due date: 28th of December
I was having contractions the previous day when I picked my parents from the airport, nice steady ones, every 6 min, then the mucus came out ('the show' - which means labour could start within hours or days). Good sign! So, on the 28th, Ake basically said, 'Ok, I know the doctor said he might be late, but I just wanna go and have you checked out.'
28 December
1 pm
So off we go on the 28th at noon to BNH Hospital to find that I was actually in latent labour and didn't know it. 2 cm dilated. The doc was very reassuring and nice and told us we should definetly check in. I was gonna deliver probably tomorrow am.
Now, the labour suites at BNH are just fantastic, huge plasma screen TV, aromteraphy, exercise ball, mats, pillows, and at my request, a birth stool(a kind of a metal frame which allows you to sit on like you would on a toilet).
6 pm
We relaxed for hours, having KIT KAT and green tea and watching movies on HBO. And some of my favorites too, Lord of war..Anyhow, for hours now I was having contractions every 10 min. At 6, a nurse came to check me out. ONLY 3 cm dilated...I progressed JUST 1 cm in 5 hours...(for those who don't have kids - giving birth happens at 10 cm)...A nice progress is 1 cm / hour and I was dragging on...
From 6 pm onwards contractions started to pick up and by 10 pm I was having full on strong contractions, every 3 min.
11 pm
The doctor comes to check me out. I'm thinking I would be 6-7 cm by now, but bad news, JUST 4 cm...The trouble is, IT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO HURT at just 4 cm!!! What the heck I'm gonna do at 10 cm, then...I keep rocking on the ball, doing my yoga breathing and chant with Ake 'Breathe, let the pain goooo!Breeeeathe!'...
I'd progressed 2 cm in 10 hours...that's slower then a pregant snail!
Around 11 pm I had this urge to go to the bathroom..and there was the most painfull 2 min of my life when my waters broke in a gush and I screamed my heart out.AGONY!!..Ake confessed later, THAT was the moment he was really scared.
Strangely enough, the contractions don't get stronger and I find it easier and easier to cope with...rocking on the ball, and pressing my back while in stir-ups really works, while I discover that laying down in bed in THE WORST thing to do.
MIDNIGHT
Doc comes again, and SUPRISE, I'm now 9 cm. I went from 4 to 9 in one hour... This is GREAT GREAT GREAT NEWS. I got such an energy boost...Ake keeps rubbing my back telling me, were nearly there...
1 am
I'm starting to feel the urge to push and make a run for the birth stool...Doc comes in and tells Ake in Thai, this might be couple of hours for a first time mom, so stay cool...Pushing is easy...in fact, getting to bloody 4 cm was the hardest part...and as the nurses slowly get ready, with Ake coaching me to push, OOOPS, THE HEAAAAD IS OUT!! I catch Andrei's head in my hands and push the whole body out. What a feeling! I caught my baby. And it's a little Ake!...My legs are shaking, I start crying with joy while the nurses are running for gloves. Andrei is in my hands crying his heart out. Go ahead son, work out those lungs!
Baby taking care of, and I lay down on the bed to get the placenta out. I'd push so hard that I have muscle spasms in my legs, but no urge to push...half an hour and the doctor can't get the placenta out through massage, cause I'm not relaxed. Luckily I know Thai, cause she says to Ake "were gonna have to prep her for surgery!" WHAT? No way. Not when I've come this far. I'm not letting any scalpel touch me now...I signal to the doctor 'Let me have one more push.' Hurray, the placenta comes out! I'm done!!!!
Sure, I have a 3rd degree tear, but those love hormones we're supposed to have in huge quantaties at birth are really really working. I can't feel anything but pure joy and sheer happiness!
Birth is fantastic!
Following...Postparthum Thoughts
Due date: 28th of December
I was having contractions the previous day when I picked my parents from the airport, nice steady ones, every 6 min, then the mucus came out ('the show' - which means labour could start within hours or days). Good sign! So, on the 28th, Ake basically said, 'Ok, I know the doctor said he might be late, but I just wanna go and have you checked out.'
28 December
1 pm
So off we go on the 28th at noon to BNH Hospital to find that I was actually in latent labour and didn't know it. 2 cm dilated. The doc was very reassuring and nice and told us we should definetly check in. I was gonna deliver probably tomorrow am.
Now, the labour suites at BNH are just fantastic, huge plasma screen TV, aromteraphy, exercise ball, mats, pillows, and at my request, a birth stool(a kind of a metal frame which allows you to sit on like you would on a toilet).
6 pm
We relaxed for hours, having KIT KAT and green tea and watching movies on HBO. And some of my favorites too, Lord of war..Anyhow, for hours now I was having contractions every 10 min. At 6, a nurse came to check me out. ONLY 3 cm dilated...I progressed JUST 1 cm in 5 hours...(for those who don't have kids - giving birth happens at 10 cm)...A nice progress is 1 cm / hour and I was dragging on...
From 6 pm onwards contractions started to pick up and by 10 pm I was having full on strong contractions, every 3 min.
11 pm
The doctor comes to check me out. I'm thinking I would be 6-7 cm by now, but bad news, JUST 4 cm...The trouble is, IT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO HURT at just 4 cm!!! What the heck I'm gonna do at 10 cm, then...I keep rocking on the ball, doing my yoga breathing and chant with Ake 'Breathe, let the pain goooo!Breeeeathe!'...
I'd progressed 2 cm in 10 hours...that's slower then a pregant snail!
Around 11 pm I had this urge to go to the bathroom..and there was the most painfull 2 min of my life when my waters broke in a gush and I screamed my heart out.AGONY!!..Ake confessed later, THAT was the moment he was really scared.
Strangely enough, the contractions don't get stronger and I find it easier and easier to cope with...rocking on the ball, and pressing my back while in stir-ups really works, while I discover that laying down in bed in THE WORST thing to do.
MIDNIGHT
Doc comes again, and SUPRISE, I'm now 9 cm. I went from 4 to 9 in one hour... This is GREAT GREAT GREAT NEWS. I got such an energy boost...Ake keeps rubbing my back telling me, were nearly there...
1 am
I'm starting to feel the urge to push and make a run for the birth stool...Doc comes in and tells Ake in Thai, this might be couple of hours for a first time mom, so stay cool...Pushing is easy...in fact, getting to bloody 4 cm was the hardest part...and as the nurses slowly get ready, with Ake coaching me to push, OOOPS, THE HEAAAAD IS OUT!! I catch Andrei's head in my hands and push the whole body out. What a feeling! I caught my baby. And it's a little Ake!...My legs are shaking, I start crying with joy while the nurses are running for gloves. Andrei is in my hands crying his heart out. Go ahead son, work out those lungs!
Baby taking care of, and I lay down on the bed to get the placenta out. I'd push so hard that I have muscle spasms in my legs, but no urge to push...half an hour and the doctor can't get the placenta out through massage, cause I'm not relaxed. Luckily I know Thai, cause she says to Ake "were gonna have to prep her for surgery!" WHAT? No way. Not when I've come this far. I'm not letting any scalpel touch me now...I signal to the doctor 'Let me have one more push.' Hurray, the placenta comes out! I'm done!!!!
Sure, I have a 3rd degree tear, but those love hormones we're supposed to have in huge quantaties at birth are really really working. I can't feel anything but pure joy and sheer happiness!
Birth is fantastic!
Following...Postparthum Thoughts
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